Heavy Heart

So I don't even think people look at blogs anymore...not with all the new stuff out now days.  But I do print my  blog every year and I want my kids to have these memories, our memories.  So with that I write in hopes one day in the future that when life is tough for them that they will be able to find some peace in this. 

Dear kids,
    As I teach in the high school for years now and have served in the young women for years as well, I have seen and grown a lot.  I see these incredible kids with so much talent and things to offer coming from good, solid homes, as well as kids coming from hard, harsh, ugly environments.  With all that I have seen I have seen the worth and confidence of too many young people crumble under peer pressure, to fit in, to be cool, to hide from their real demons, and for many other reasons.  I watch like in slow motion these kids go down a self destructive path and it costs them much.  Costs them their families trust, their self worth, their self respect, their reputation, their souls. 
     This is not how it was meant to be.  although I look at the world today I know full well I didn't have near the stuff that you have to deal with now.  I thought my life was tough as a teenager, now youth see it as impossible to stay good.  Don't!  Don't ever get in a place in your life where you tell yourself you can't do it, you can't stand up to peer pressure, your not good enough, pretty enough, or loved enough.  YOU ARE.  Not only is me and dad your biggest fans and will love you until the day you forever, but the Lord is on your side, more importantly you need to be on His side.  You are beautiful inside and out, I have spent to many years since you were all born thinking about how I could instill in each of you the confidence you will need to face what you will face.  Never doubt yourself, Never doubt that your a child of God.  Always know someone is there, and it's never more than you can handle. 
      Don't let anything or anyone pull you down.  Learn as early on as you can who you are and where you come from.  And stand strong by don't hesitate, stand firm in what you are.  Don't ever change to make yourself "fit in."  The cost is too high when that is done, trust me I see it on a daily basis.  You never need to try and be something your not to look cool.  Someone is out there that is perfect for you just the way you are.  Without putting on a mask for people or changing who you are, but just the way you are is perfect.  You will have weakness, and shortcomings, and yet you are the perfect  you.  Don't allow anyone to ever take that confidence from you.  I love you kids more than I can put in words.  And your all still so small now, Mya 6 Marlee 4 Treyvin 3 and X 9 months.  I look at you know and think you have your whole life infront of you.  and if somehow someway if I can point you in the right direction and give you all the love and confidence you need to soar.  Home is your safe place, and I pray that you will soar, and you will conquer all that stands in your way or tries to tell you or make you feel that you are not good enough the way you are.  You are.  Pick friends that lift you up and accept you for you.  Pick friends that make you want to be better and are kind and understanding.  Don't try and fit in "that group".  Trust me I spent way too many years trying to fit in that group and that one.  And guess what I never did.  I wasted so much for what?  Nothing it got me no where, but a broken self esteem and no confidence in who I was.  It doesn't matter what size you are beauty is in each and everyone of you.  It doesn't matter if your hair isn't as long or thick as you think it should be, your beautiful and handsome.  You may not be as coordinated as you wanted to be, it's ok your still amazing.  I promise to never give up you if you promise to never give up on yourself.  I love you kids

                                             Love,
                                                         Mom